Finally Pictures!!!!

Seems like it has taken me forever. I hate to end posts on a "not so happy note". So today I have pics!!!!

I met a very nice lady on the Internet.

Take a look :0

I was so thrilled.

Now my little mind is a workin, what should I blend it with? What should I make? What a pattern? Do the rest of you take so much time planning projects? It takes me almost as long to figure what I going to make as it does to make it!! Of course I love looking on the Internet for patterns, and going thru all my old magazines ewing and awing over patterns.

I have some lovely Shetland in a light grey that I think is calling my name on this :))

I have also been working on Heathers scarf of the hat,gloves and scarf set. She was at 20 degrees this morning and walks Hayden to school in the morning so I'm thinking I need to spend some time on that for her!!! This is the pattern I'm using. Do you know how hard it is to find a pattern for a matching set of all 3?

Heather loves purple, I have some yarn that was some of the first yarn I ever spun, eeekkk over 10 years ago, I don't even remember all that is in it, except mohair and angora. Looks like maybe Merino, it's all very soft. But it is overspun in some spots and not really even. But it is giving it a nice texture and when it's blocked I think it will be pretty.
It changes color and texture so much I am switching from skein to skein so it will look consistent when I am done.

Here is a picture of the scarf so far.

I also came across my first attempt at weaving! It is a rug I never finished, wasn't happy with the weight. But it's interesting to look at now. The warp is Hemp and the weft is a hand spun yucky yellow wool and the rest is Linen. I got a kick out of it, I may just weave in the loose ends and put in front of the back door.

Here is a picture or the Salish taupe yarn I am spinning for this! It is so springy! This is the neatest fleece. The silver I have is much like very soft mohair, the brown and taupe is very crimpy and soft. I haven't gotten the white, except the lamb, washed yet so I'm not sure what it will resemble.

I have eyed this for a long time, but haven't been in an area where I could really wear it. Well this year in NC, it looks like it will be cold enough. Now will I have it done in time to wear it this year? Probably not :(

I also got a couple of pictures of the goats yesterday, they are so cute!

They are Boar goats, as you can see they talk and smile!

Smiddy smiling

Little Candy :)

Her hiney is getting so furry, I think I see spinning in her future!

Then there was this little thing that followed me home the other day.I just turned around and there it was :)
She is a Union Special Loom made for rugs in the early 1900's. Made of mostly oak and in good condition. After we move I will get her all cleaned up and ready to go! It's the only 2 shaft loom I have and will be perfect for making fleece rugs.

I am so anxious to get all my looms set up, I'm sure it will take me a year to get them all warped!

So I am going to start my socks today. There is a yahoo group I joined to learn how to make socks from the toe up to fit any foot, any yarn, any needles. That will come in handy as I spin all my yarns and have many different feet to knit for!

This is some Salish I'm going to knit my spinnin socks out of,

I don't know if I am weird, but I sure do enjoy the yahoo groups I belong to. There is one I can't post to :( but the rest I really like. I have developed a fond relationship with the members and look forward to hearing of their projects, learning from them and sharing mine. I usually check in when I take a break thru out the day.

I also really enjoy blogs! I am in awe of some peoples! They are so elegant in their writings, explain things so well, and have posts that are so interesting. It can be very intimidating! I am going to take the time to add some good links to mine this week. I would l really like to search out some good ones for knitting, spinning, weaving and quilting. I haven't added any for quilting and I really enjoy it, but haven't had the time to really participate in that activity for a while. I have had 2 quilt tops finished for several years! One for my "step" ( won't pref ice that again as she is more than that ) mom and one for my hubby. I actually have the batting and backing all basted and ready to quilt for my mom. It's in a box :( O well I do have the best intentions :)

My leg!! It just isn't getting better. I'm not sure what they are going to do. I will see the Dr at the end of the week if it doesn't look any better. I don't have any health ins. at the moment becasue of the job move hubby has made. So to go into the hospital at this point really isn't an option! Maybe just more antibiotics. It's still red and hot and hard! I keep thinking every morning I will wake up and it will be gone!

I've had way to much time on my hands with hubby up north and really miss him. I didn't really realize how much we shared at the end of the day, or through out the day as far as that goes! We draw alot of strength from each other on those not so good days too. Hopefully we will be able to finish this move by mid Dec.

I am also finding I don't make good use of my time without those "deadlines" when you have that extra person in your life you work around. My mom has had that since my dad passed a year ago. It's is very easy to wander and not accomplish things thru out the day. Maybe it's age! Oh No!

Leg on the Mend!

So today I went to see the Dr about the leg again, it is much better. But I am having a reaction to the Tetanus shot! My whole arm and shoulder is swollen and soooo sore, red and hot! She said I probably wouldn't be getting one of these anytime soon again! I remembered when I was a teenager, way back then, that I got really sick from a tetanus shot. But my leg looked so bad, I figured, it had been a long time ago and I probably was just being a baby. Well, now I remember!! Boy for being fairly healthy, this has been the pitts.
Today, I am going to give spinning a go again. I really want to finish the sock yarn on the Mach 1. I need to give her a name. Names really aren't my thing. Maybe wheel 1 and wheel 2?
Atleast now, we won't have to watch any more politics for a while!! Even though I am very disappointed at the out come, I am grateful for that!
I also need to get my room empty and ready to move. Get the trailer that hubby is staying in cleaned for him this week end, and start packing stuff up. I had an interesting question posted to me today and it made me stop and think. What are you worried about, anxiety over change? I have never really been a person to not roll with the flow. I haven't been controlling, or up tight. So when did this all change? Then it hit me. I got so scared when I couldn't do anything for Jeffery. The whole world changed in a split second for ever. Not just my world, the future of his wife and children, his sister, his dad, mine, everyone who knew him. I now feel scared because I now know, I really don't know what will happen, that I can do anything about it, or what is coming. Now it's not like I didn't know it before! I know who is in control. It is just so easy to say you "know" but then to let him do that! I feel like I am hanging on to something for dear life afraid to let go. I'm not quite sure what it is. It feels like change is my enemy and is very frightening. Now in my mind, I can work thru it, but in my heart and gut, the anxiety is over whelming. I haven't really spent much time trying to work my way thru our loss. I don't think you can, and just getting thru each day is such a exhausting job allot of the time, I feel encouraged to be able to do that. But I guess I also need to get back on track some what to my old self. I have turned off most all feelings except grief, fear and anxiety. But I can put on a happy face! I don't think that is unusual under these types of events, it is very hard to give yourself permission to feel anything else. I also had another mother tell me she got angry when people said they were sorry for her loss. She didn't feel that they understood. She's right. It's a different kind of anger I think. For me it's "why me" " what are you sorry about you have your son" " sorry doesn't even begin to touch it" I could go on and on but you get the point. People are very uncomfortable being around people after they have lost a child, they don't like you to talk about them, how you are feeling and how bad you hurt. They say silly things like "You'll get thru this" or " it'll be okay" "be thankful you have grandchildren" I know they try. Sometimes you just can't say any thing. It's been 2 years for me, and I have stopped crying everyday. I get that hole in my gut several times a day instead of all day. I can get a smile on my face once in a great while when I think of him instead of just tears. I can remind myself I can still enjoy life from time to time. But I hadn't realized I was carrying that fear with me on a daily basis. Thanks Michelle, if you hadn't posed that question, I may not have taken the time to think about it :) So I am going to approach this move as a new adventure. Work harder to have more good days that hard ones, more good thoughts than sad ones, more calm days than anxious ones, and most important, more faith and trust in him that put me here and loved me enough to give his son for me.

Twists and Turns in Life

Well it's been a long month for me, and this will probably be a long post. First my bite, as you all said and I wouldn't listen, see I'm not even giving you a chance to say I told you so, I went to the Dr and it has gotten infected. It had started healing so nicely, but there is one spot where Pennys tooth went in so far, it just wouldn't heal up quick enough and has in fact pretty yucky. So I am on meds and go to see her again tomorrow. It doesn't really hurt, it just looks bad.

For the last month we have had some difficult decisions to make. When we moved here to help our son in his business, we had pretty much lost every thing for our retirement in a business we had of our own. I won't go into great detail, but had been in business a long time. We depended on insurance payments as we were in restoration, after the Cedar fire, we lived in that area of CA. we got overwhelmed with jobs, there came the big hurricane in Florida and all the ins. companies moved down there and stopped making payments to businesses in Ca. Therefore, we did all the work and ended up having to wait for well over a year for payments! Alot they never paid at all! After a hard look at what we wanted and where we were headed, we decided to close. Weren't left with much, but did manage to pay off almost all bills the business had incurred.
We moved to Tucson, love Tuscon, and hubby went back into Commercial truck sales. He had been a Manager for years and is quite good at it. Having always being around the kids and grand kids, when Jeffery called up and asked us to come out to SC to help him, and he was calling his sister to come too, we were excited. So up we went and out to SC. It was great, both kids and all the grand kids were close and we could retire here.

Well Jeffery was killed, Jane turned horrible, we paid to close up our end of his business, can't see the grand kids, Heather my daughter has moved back the Wisconsin and here we sit. Hubby has gone back into the truck business and things have gotten very tight since the economy has taken a dive and actually even before that, here in SC. He has gotten an offer to move to NC and take a position with one of the largest dealers on the east coast, which means lots of inventory,financing ect. He is very good at what he does they even have offered to pay moving expenses which is very helpful. I am just so tired of moving! We had lived in the same place for over 10 years in Ca. and seems like we have been on the move ever since and it is driving me crazy! Before Ca. after the kids left home, we raised thm in Oregon, we sold our home and purchased a 5th wheel and traveled for 10 years. It was great but at the end of the 10 we were both ready to put the roots back down and stay put. Both the kids married and moved to Ca. and we were able to enjoy both of their families. It really was so nice to enjoy them as adults, neither of them were easy to raise! Both were older when they got married, 28 for Jeffery and 31 for Heather. After the business failed, kids scattered, we scattered and that was that.
So now we are faced with another move, guess not always a bad thing. We have been trying to "listen" to what God has in store for us and sometimes I sure wish he would talk louder. We have found a place in NC, with 2 acres, we can take the goats, dogs ect. It has a older mobile home on it we can move to the lower area and I can set it up as a studio. It will be great when all is said and done, but until then I have a tendency to worry, my hubby says, so it is very stressful.. SC hasn't been a very good place for us and I thought I would be looking forward to getting out of here, which I am in a lot of ways, but it feels odd to know I am leaving Jeffery here and that chapter of my life will be over. It is like it is the final act to making me realize he is really gone. At the same time, it is also a new beginning and as far as Jeffery is concerned, I have no choice there.
So, I have very mixed feelings, hubby is up in NC and coming home on week ends till we get everything handled, so I have even more time to worry :(
I will say that having a blog is cheaper than a therapist! Fiber cheaper than pills :) So I know I will be okay, I seem to remember when I was young, I thought life would get easier as I got older. Wrong!

I GUESS I'M IRRITABLE TODAY :(

It must be one of those days. I don't get them often. Everyone seems to be irritating today. I don't know what is wrong with everyone! I have a headache, am having some personal things going on, trying some new meds and feel like smacking someone :(
So I figured seeing that everyone was going out of their way to irritate me today, I would stay in and work with fiber. Well that didn't go so good. I can't seem to get this stupid CVM to comb without neps!! It looks like it has neps before I comb it.
So I decide to read some blogs, people are even going out of their way to tick me off long distance! So if I left you a nasty comment, chalk it up to a bad day. Now I'm afraid to answer any posts as I am really coming off nasty, and I really don't mean to. So today will be a reading day.
I've yelled at the dogs, called my best friend to complain, emailed my puter friend to complain too, complained to my hubby ( he may go out for a beer :0).
My blog is my last outlet for this type of thing, but here it is, my journal part :)
You can be very thankful you are just reading this and not with in shooting distance :)
Am I alone? Does anyone just feel angry for no reason? This is so unlike me!
O Well this day to will be over, and tomorrow will be the best day in the whole world! ( I'm making myself sick)
So much for Polly Anna, it doesn't become me!